Sometimes i juz feel like banging my head on the mirror... or create a suicidal massacre down the neighbourhood.. or juz put something in me dat makes me doze off & never wake up again..
Arrgghhhhh.... feel like screaming to my highest pitch in d mid of dis damn nyte..
i hate nytez..
aarrggghhhh, my damn frustation wit myself.... feel like digging my brains out... Dun ask y.. cuz i dunno why i'm sooo frustrated. i dunno wats bothering me.. i dunno wat m i talking about... i dunno.. i need someone to dig my brains out.. Kill Me.
all i noe is dat i juz want this brain of mind to stop thinking thousands of stuffs & juz let me sleep!!!!! so much to think of... so much to worry of.. so much to take care of.. i have not been venging my anger for like 2-3 years.. keeping all from within me. i have to... i'm trying so hard to stop da violence in me...
But it seems i can see myself changing back to whom i used to b...
i've started back to my drinking habits... Yeahh...
how i fucking hate myself...soo much hatred in me, so much frustration, anger, vengeance... soo much i'm keeping within myself... it's slowly coming back out... i hate sarcasm. i hate rumors.i hate love. i hate evry single things in life.
& i won't b surprised if i'll b in mental hospital ..
it's obviously obvious that i'm gonna b a crazy guy..... but i'm not crazy..i'm juz a lil' unwell...
Arrrrgghhh... i'm juz trying soo hard to put myself to sleep... evrynyte... My sleeping habit has worsen since almost 2years back... i hate myself... i cant stop my mind frm thinking soo much... a million thoughts...
i dun even noe wat the hell i'm typing... i'm juz soo Frustrated with myself..with my life.. i've soo many things, problems, memories that my brain wants to think of..a stubborn mind, it seems... Evryday, i feel like i'm d rope, n Good side of me is pulling me towards it, n my Bad side at d opposite end is trying to pull me near it too... its like i'm in a tug-of-war ..
awwww shit, forget it, ppl cant undstd wat i'm trying to mean. Stupid me. Having a life like mine is so complicated. I am my own worst Enemy.
arrgghhh, juz need lotsa beer liquor wine stout ryte now...!!!! kills my stress for tonyte.
Fuck ar.. somebody stop me from drinking.. punch me, kick me, kill me if u haf to. The Devil has finally possessed my once again. mayb later one day u'll see me with handcuffs. Fuck life.